Wednesday, April 6, 2011

All I Really Need to Know, I Learned From ABBA: A truly stupid off-schedule post

ABBA visits Sears Portrait Studio?
The soaring harmonies, the feathered hair, the platforms shoes... the important life lessons? I submit to you the following pearls of polyester double-knit wisdom:

Money, Money, Money
It is, to be sure, a rich man's world, baby.

Knowing Me, Knowing You
We all suck in someone's eyes.

The Winner Takes All
Just ask Charlie Sheen. Sigh...

Take a Chance On Me
I'm awesome and well worth everyone's time. Just ask me.

I Do, I Do, I Do, I Do, I Do
I did.

When I Kissed the Teacher
See “I Do, I Do, I Do, I Do, I Do”


Today's exercise: Play some Violent Femmes or Led Zeppelin or such to prevent your brain from being taken over by ABBA earworms. Damn catchy dreck, that...

Next: Something far better thought out...


Tuesday, April 5, 2011

What It's All About


You put your right foot in.
You put your right foot out.
You put your right foot in,
And you shake it all about.
You do the hokey pokey,
And you turn yourself around.
That's what it's all about!


You may not have realized it at the time, but the roller rink* DJ of your childhood was laying down some serious wisdom in between the couples' skate and the shoot-the-duck contest. You see, more than just a children's song, the Hokey Pokey truly is what it is all about.

Let's take a closer look at the seemingly nonsensical lyrics, for, as the true Seeker of the YUM knows, great truth will often sound like gibberish to the unenlightened.

You put your right foot (left foot, right arm, left arm, etc., progressing to whole self) in.


You have gifts, talents, strengths – an entire self to contribute to this grand experiment we call “living” - and you are called on by your fellows to contribute.

You put your right foot (etc.) out.

Sometimes it is necessary to retreat from the world, in order to identify how you can best contribute. It is not enough to act for action's sake. We must also act mindfully and with purpose.   

You put your right foot (etc.) in...

Once you have identified your goals/purpose, you must return to the world and to action in order to see them through.

...And you shake it all about.


It is not enough to simply give of yourself, but you must use your talents and skills to the utmost.

You do the Hokey Pokey and your turn yourself around.


The more your give of yourself, the more change you will see in the world, and more importantly, in yourself.

And that's what it's all about.
That, or it's a thinly-veiled reference to sex. Either way...


Today's exercise:
Do the Hokey Pokey!

Next: Life lessons gleaned from ABBA at the roller rink. (#1: Don't listen to ABBA... or at least not sober... Skål, y'all! )


*If you were born after 1985, you may need ask your parents what roller rinks were. Maybe there's a video on YouTube...

Friday, April 1, 2011

April Fools For Love

Never let it be said that The Yummish don't enjoy a good joke and appreciate a range of verbal and visual play from the clever to the filthy. We do tend, however, to be suspicious of those jokes labeled “practical,” as they often seem more correctly termed “mean spirited.” While we recognize that this is not always the case, we are inclined to approach April Fools Day, with it's emphasis on pranksterism, with caution.

That being said, we are huge fans of Acting the Fool.

Thus, we propose a different, more Yummish approach to marking this day: April Fools For Love.

Far from being a cretin or an idiot, The Fool is the archetypal innocent, the gamboling essence of youth. He is the tabula rasa. He is us, before the stories of our lives began to be written. He is inexperience and potential.

Today, rather than setting them up to be made to feel foolish, we suggest that you be The Fool for those you love.

Let go of those events of the past that you carry with you, burdening your relationships. Without that heavy load, you'll find more spring in your step. Releasing long-built stores of recrimination and regret makes room for hope to flourish. For one day, try seeing your loved ones through the eyes of The Fool – blind to the past, seeing only the brilliance of what is to come.

For as The Man once sang with burning blue-eyed intensity:

These are the days of the endless summer
These are the days, the time is now
There is no past, there's only future
There's only here, there's only now


Today's exercise: Let your inner Fool guide you

Next:
The Hokey Pokey and how it truly is what it's all about.