Thursday, August 19, 2010

The Ties That Bind: The Importance of Kinks, Fetishes and Bondage Accessories in the Yummish Life

It is important to state, from the outset, that the Yummish use of the term “bondage” differs somewhat from that found on the high-number channels of your digital cable box. (Though it can encompass that definition of the term, as well, if that is one's Yum.) The Yummish use of the word in no way implies limitation or, worse yet, enslavement. Rather Yummish Bondage is closer to the merging of two or more atoms to form a single molecule. Each part retains its own identity, its own “self,” at the same time, each is completely changed, transformed into a new whole greater than the sum of these parts. This is the bond shared among spouses (result: marriage), parents and children (result: family), soccer fans (result: stadium riot) – a bond of deep caring and great passion.

Some sticklers for grammar have pointed out that the word “bonding” could be used in place of “bondage,” thus clarifying the whole issue. After giving it much thought, the Yummish Council elected to stay with the less grammatical but cheekier term, simply because it was so.

However, to avoid/create future confusion, below is a list of terms related to said Bondage and their use in the Yummish context:

Kink: (n) A Yum shared by two or more people which non-participants might consider offbeat, such as a shared passion for salsa dancing or for dancing in salsa. Kinks are often the foundation of Yummish bonds.

Fetish: (n) An external sign of a Yum shared by two or more people. The fetish is used to signify the Yummish bond both between/among the partners and to the world at large i.e., wedding bands or Red Wings fan jerseys.

Bondage Accessory: (n) Externals that strengthen and promote a Yummish bond. They may be large and complex affairs, like a summer home on the beach, or small, simple items like the old swing on the porch where you sit every night after the kids have gone to bed.

These kinks, fetishes and other accessories are the ties that bind us together, allow us to share something of our unique experience as a person (aka Yum) with another person or persons and to know, with complete, blissful certainty, that the other has felt as you feel. That experience makes all these accessories sacred, no matter how great or small their “actual” value.

Our lives are filled with such kinks and fetishes. We share friendship bracelets. We share last names. We claim songs and dates and places as “ours.” We make homes and fill them with mementos and souvenirs. We cling to the tangibles left behind when a Yum has departed – Grandma's pearl earrings, Grandpa's vintage girlie magazines – to help us reconnect with that Yum, out of time and place. We stockpile pictures and keepsakes, memories of who we've been and known through time, to give us a sense of our own place. They are both the ties that bind us and the experiences that define us.

Today's Yummish Exercise: Identify your own kinks and fetishes and their attendant bondage accessories. Practice taking more mindful pleasure in their use while being aware of their great power and importance.

Next: Either a new recipe or a new Yummish saint. It remains to be seen.

1 comment:

  1. Interesting post. My bondage accessories (I can't believe I just wrote that) would probably be photos and mementos from our travels. We have photos of us all over the US, Europe and even Africa, post cards, ticket stubs, pamphlets, matchbooks, cocktail napkins and even coasters from the various places we've visited. We like to pull out the huge box that contains them every now and then and look back at all the places we've been and the things we've done. It bonds us together to remember what all we've done, all the fun we've had and all the crazy things we've done.