Notes from the 2011 Yummish Council Retreat in Las Vegas

$.99 margaritas... 110 degrees in the shade...

What in the hell is she wearing?

My next car will be stainless steel

Bourbon Street-themed to-go bars... 80s flashback week... Room décor by IKEA... 

How did I get a sunburn there?

Me: Why is that girl dressed like a milkmaid hooker?
Jim: I think she's supposed to be Sailor Moon.
Me: Oh, OK.

A Tarot reading? Sure! An adventurous, free-spirit, you say? How could you tell?

I <3 authenticity

Psychic: You've come close to death twice.
Me: It's been a slow morning.

Semi-sober black-light mini-golf... Cupid's Wedding Chapel drive by...

Pardon me, do you carry any stockings that aren't crotchless?

Less “Fear and Loathing” than “The Rum Diary.” Hello Sailor Jerry!

Desert sushi... Midnight gelato... 4AM doughnuts... Hair of the dog...

You'll do what? For how much?!?

My favorite vending machine

Today's exercise: The Council is still searching for the ultimate “take away” from this year's retreat... as well as a half-empty tube of particularly flattering pink lip gloss last seen somewhere on Fremont Street and one pair of tighty-whiteys. If found, please contact...

Next: Possibly that list of literary mash-ups I've threatened in the past...